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Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Excuse me! Would you take a moment and look in the mirror and look at the beauty who is YOU. Look at you! I wish we could have a mirror to view our inner beauty, but I’m afraid the mirror couldn’t handle such an extraordinary feat!

Lately, I’ve noticed some consistent things about women. That some of you ladies “musta forgot” how fabulous you are-and I am, too, guilty of this. I’ve attended conferences, summits, and had discussions over the last 2 months and have noticed how hurt, frustrated, unappreciated and in pain you are-which in turn pained me. We as women, have to wear so many hats, that at times we lose ourselves trying to be everything to everyone—and this will just never happen. I attended one conference in particular a few weeks ago. I was there as a speaker, and remember thinking “If I weren’t a speaker, I don’t know if I would be here because relationships/ being single is not my struggle” The Lord had me there for another reason- to see in how much pain women are and how much we hold in. During one point in the day-almost every woman was in tears. These were beautiful, strong, and intelligent women of God who seemed never to have the time to reflect on past pain and forgive; Who never have the time to focus on the God’s Couture they are and were created to be; Who never have time to just sit back a focus on how blessed and fabulous they are! Who rarely have the time to just think about themselves. Nehemiah 8:10
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.

Society and the media tell us that we can never do enough or when we do enough, it’s not a big deal (But remember we should not be trying to please society). Examples:

Example 1: Why is it when a single woman does what she needs to do in raising her children, it’s status quo and never recognized? But if a father does what he is supposed to do, we throw a parade for him. Don’t get me wrong, it is wonderful when men do what they are supposed to do, but why not recognize the moms?

On another note: People have actually gotten irritated at mothers and women for trying to help young men become the best they can be by saying it takes a man to raise a man—which is absolutely true. But when a man is not around, the woman is doing what she has to do. So how about let’s fuss at and hold these absent men accountable and thank the mothers for going far and beyond!

Example 2: A woman gets a college degree it’s great. But if a male gets it—we’ve rented a blimp to announce it.

Example 3: Women are expected to be a counselor, nurse, teacher, principal, chef, supervisor all in one and better not complain

Example 4: Expectations are different-A friend told me that she grew up with her family telling her to wait on marriage so she could focus on her career and education and build a solid foundation, while her brother was told not to get a girl pregnant while in college.

Example 5: The media has had many stories about the plight of the Single Professional Black Woman. (Take a read at the latest post on http://nosexnthecity.wordpress.com/ called single, black, female). Oh no, we’re educated, make some money, are climbing the ladder, have standards and this is a problem? We are to be at fault because we have goals and reach them? What tha???

Example 6: Ladies, we are also part of the problem. Can we do more supporting of one another and less hating and discouraging? I have a friend who is purchasing a home and has received many discouraging statements from women. I attended a conference last year and introduced myself as Dr. Kristen Guillory and a woman much older than me told me “You don’t need to introduce yourself as Dr.-you were not born with that” Really?? A coworker asked a friend “What do you wear on the weekend” she said “If I am at home-sweats” The co-worker said “Eeew, that’s why you are in your situation (single). What if the president visits your house” 

Really What tha??

Well ladies,  let’s encourage one another and I want to thank you for taking care of your children, encourage you to go head with getting your degree, a house, and you go ahead climb that ladder, while remembering to give God the glory and making sure that it’s glorifying the Kingdom!

Ladies, we must take time for ourselves. Even if this means-sitting down, watching TV, and eating gummy bears (oh, don’t pretend like I’m the only adult who likes gummy bears). Keep these scriptures in mind.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

Next, is an excerpt from I am a Daughter of Destiny, Purpose, and Promise written by Minister Toni Roberts (this truly spoke to the women who attended the All the Single Ladies Conference)

I am uniquely and wonderfully created in the image of God

I am who God says I am and not where I’ve been or what I have been through

I am loved by God so much that He has given me predestined life with plans to prosper me and not to harm me, to give me hope and a future

I acknowledge that my way of obtaining love and acceptance is not always best for me and I submit to the will of an Almighty God for my life

Lord, I ask you to forgive me for not guarding my heart for out of it flows life.

God I pray for strength to forgive myself when I settle for less than what or who you have for me. Help me forgive those who have hurt, misused and misunderstood me. I pray that I will be forgiven when in pain I unknowingly hurt others.

I declare that I am strengthened through my trials, tribulations, and seem to be setbacks. I declare that my now is to be celebrated because it has nothing to do with today and everything to do with where I am going

Ladies, you are Fabulous and Don’t you ever Forget it!!! You better Work it! 

When you look in the mirror, try a pose! 🙂

  Today’s Nugget: 3 things: Re-read the above excerpt a few times. Think of someone you need to forgive and do it! Look, in the mirror. What do you see? If you don’t see a fabulous woman and God’s couture ask God to help you to see how He sees you.